Sometimes Growing Up is Hard

My sweet Jayden,

So here you are, just a month short of turning 10. You're stuck between that age of being a "kid" and being a young man. I've already started seeing the changes. From wearing deodorant to politely saying you are too old to play in the Chick-Fil-A play area, you're changing. It's so bitter sweet. I still remember your sweet little face when I brought you home from the hospital, and I can't believe it's been 10 years. Time has flown. And my baby boy is not so much a baby anymore.

But last week when we were at the mall with your cousins and your Daddy told you that you were too old to play in the play area, you collapsed in my arms with tears - something you never do. I knew that getting older was getting a little bit hard.

I remember being at this point, my sweet boy. Being at the place where you don't quite fit in. And being the oldest, makes it a little harder. I know because I've been there. You're treading your own path. A path your two brothers and sister will soon walk in. And you will make it a little easier for them because you've already been there. They will have you to look up to.

But today, I want you to know that I'm soooo proud of you. You are so strong. You are strong in your beliefs, you are strong in your faith, you are strong in yourself. You are a leader. That's why God chose you to be the firstborn. And as hard as it may be, it makes you extra special.

You're so responsible already. Always there to help with Owen or give a hand at making lunch. You're so independent sometimes it hurts. But I know that's what makes you, you. It's a special gift God has given you. But I also want you to know that it's ok to need your Dad and I sometimes. It's ok to cry in my arms every now and then and it's ok to feel vulnerable and be a little unsure about growing up. We will always be there for you. 

I can't wait to see the amazing person you will become. Every day I watch you as you just do your thing. School, chores, sports, being a big brother. You are an amazing little guy and I can't even begin to tell you how much I love you.

Love, Mom

3 comments:

  1. He sounds like an awesome kid!
    I feel like Dylan is in a similar place. Becoming a big kid, but still wanting to be a little kid. It's hard!

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  2. What a SWEET sweet letter, Casey. I have tears in my eyes...seriously. I remember being at that point too as a first born and I can already see that Addie struggles with the idea of growing up too. But what a wonderful way to explain it to him. You are such a great mama :)

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  3. This is so sweet. I don't even know you and him and it brought tears to my eyes. He sounds a lot like my firstborn. She's so independent and has always acted so much older than she is. I love in one way that she's getting older and am sad to see my baby becoming such an independent girl. And she's only four! I can only imagine how I'll feel when she's 10.

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