The Joy of Life

This day.. It's a day that will forever be burned in my memory. It's the day my husband lost a brother. A dad, husband, uncle, and son. A day that I have looked back on with sadness, fear, and pain.

But this year is different, why? Because this year on this day, I am celebrating life. The life that is so full in my home. My precious children. My flesh and blood that will carry on my name, my heritage, my legacy.

Last year on the night of the 6th, I had been at Target and walked past the candle isle and just "knew". The smell, the way it hit my nose, or better yet, my stomach. There is only one thing that gives me that feeling. I brushed it off as being crazy and went home.

The next morning, at 5:00 am, I stormed out of bed and threw my clothes on. Jarrod was already in the bathroom getting ready and thought I was crazy. I told him I was going to Walmart and would be back. 30 minutes later, I was sitting in the bathroom bawling my eyes out. How? When? Why? That little word "pregnant" showed up faster than I could tell myself it wasn't true.

Although we had never done anything permanent we were always careful, so careful, to use all the means necessary to keep the swimmers from reaching the goal... So how?

I have to admit today that I was in such shock. I was upset. I had my hands so full. How could I have another baby?! What was God thinking?!

Of course, once the shock wore off I was finally able to be excited. What a blessing. To be chosen to once again be a mama. To create life, to feel that life inside of me, and to birth life.

Today, I am so thankful for our sweet Owen's life. This little life that tells me every minute of every day how precious life is and what joy life brings.


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7 comments:

  1. Boy oh boy can I relate. I had the same exact feelings when I found out I was pregnant with our third. We had told everyone we were done and then surprise! I was terrified to have another and I about threw the test at my husband after I took it. My finest moment for sure;). Out little guy is just about as sweet as can be and he brings so much joy to our family. We are so blessed to have him.

    Your little Owen is so cute. That was my second favorite name when we were choosing but I couldn't sway my husband.

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  2. owen is so sweet. i absolutely LOVE the picture of him that you posted. youre a great mama!

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  3. What a precious little blessing he is :)

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  4. He is precious!!!
    I felt similar feelings when I found out I was expecting this one, but once the fear of having a 4th child before we had planned wore off, I was ecstatic. I can't wait to meet this little blessing.
    Life is good, isn't it?!?

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  5. I am so happy y'all had #4! I love little Simps!

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